Fish declares war on Scientology!!!

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Joseph
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Fish declares war on Scientology!!!

Post by Joseph » Sun Feb 11, 2007 9:48 am

In an attempt to stave of the boredom one finds when they are awake in the early AM hours, and, having been divinely inspired by an article where Tom "Napoleon Complex/one-eyed trouser snake Envy" Cruise is... well, read it for yourselves: http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,4-2007030603,00.html

Image

but, yeah, back to the staving off boredom, I was tooling around the internet, reading various articles on scientology because, well, it's hilarious. I even went to their official site.. but I could feel them watching me so I left. :look:

Anyhow, as I was reading various articles and laughing and groaning and sighing, Our Lord Fish spake unto me, commanding Brother Magnus and myself to oppose scientology at all costs, to start a cult... er... religion... to make lots of money... er... spread the "truth"...

I mean, hell, if Hubbard could do it, and he was a third rate hack pulp sci-fi author, then Brother Magnus and I, being 1) smarter 2) better looking and 3) having the benefit of computers and word processors which Hubbard didn't have, can surely raise enough money to take this Holy War to the streets (while padding our pockets and living like emperors and buying an island and inviting all of our closest friends to hang out).

And so, as High Priest of the Holy Order of Fishites, and to start this Holy War off, I issue a standing challenge to Tommy boy -

I will meet you any time, any place, anywhere (of course, you'll have to cover my travel expenses cos you're rich and I'm not) to not only debate you, but to kick your whiny little ass up and down the street with my superior physical fighting prowess and then, I will haul your sorry little ass onto an analyst's couch, shove handfuls of prozac and lithium down your throat and then let the psychiatrists begin their treatment of you.

So Tom, are you tough enough to face me man to man???

The gauntlet has been thrown down biatch.

And ya know what, I don't care how much money you have... I will always be taller than you so bring it on little boy!

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Post by Jan » Sun Feb 11, 2007 12:12 pm

(too much info)

OMG and I just ate a tuna sandwich... urgh, argh, ungh...

(didn't really bother to read the above post)

Really?!

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Post by Fluffy17 » Mon Feb 12, 2007 3:16 am

Can I be the offical leader pof this crusade? Or at least military leader?
I have no time for flat characters why should I have times for flat people?

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Post by Ruathavril » Mon Feb 12, 2007 6:27 am

I feel sorry for Tommy. Do you really have to pick on him? He's just a poor (well, not in the sense of amounts of money, you dolt!), frightened, deluded little boy. Yes, frightened, why else would he flee to a religion? So, won't you please leave the poor kid alone? Why don't you try to find those behind him? The ones with the strings, who really take the cash from that...cult.
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Joseph
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Post by Joseph » Mon Feb 12, 2007 9:41 am

Surely you jest?

And the "kid" is older than both of us, Ruath.

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Post by Gorth » Mon Feb 12, 2007 11:33 pm

Some kids never grow up. I'm sure a phyciatrist would have a field a day with him (and relieve him of some of his money).
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Post by Joseph » Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:26 am

But he knows the history of psychology, don't cha know.

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Post by Ruathavril » Tue Feb 13, 2007 7:04 am

I jest. Though how much? There may be an inkling of truth behind my words. Or have I seen too much american series with conspiracy theories in them?
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Post by Jan » Tue Feb 20, 2007 8:05 pm

I dont think there is any reason for war, but maybe a hostile takeover would do the trick. It could be leveraged. On a clear moon night you can see the stars reflected in a calm sea, when the Starf... Fish calls for the alien'ated surface dwellers. I think Tom would be more than happy to join the fishies. He looks pretty bloated on that picture as if he was just washed ashore. Definitely fishy looking.

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Post by Joseph » Thu Feb 14, 2008 11:14 pm

Figured I'd bump this for kicks.

Well, that and the forum John Arkham and I met on is currently being trolled by a scientologist. Of course, he is giving us the truth as any non-scientologist is uninformed and in need of saving/guidance/enlightenment.

At least they're more entertaining than the average cult. :roll:

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Post by Gorth » Fri Feb 15, 2008 1:00 am

Nah, you just need a good Zeta scan. You never know, you might actually gain +2 to Luck :cool:
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Post by John Arkham » Fri Feb 15, 2008 5:52 am

Indeed, Josan!

His view of 'education' is most odd; all those who are against Scientology are uneducated whereas all those who follow it are educated. How does that work out?

I may give up fighting with him as he just post the same drivel over and over again. Actually I may just do what I usually do with stupid posts...post a barrage of humorous pictures!
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Post by Runenklinge » Fri Feb 15, 2008 12:27 pm

L. Ron Hubbard was the model for the gatling gun-toting Hitler in Caste Wolfenstein, m i right?

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Post by Al the Apostle » Fri Feb 15, 2008 4:40 pm

L. Ron Hubbard was an opportunist with, grudingly, enough shrewd cleverness to realise how true the adage "a fool and his money".

I notice that Tom Cruise has yet to accept Brother Joseph's challenge. This is no doubt because his private army of Googlers has yet to find this site but mostly because he knows that none can overcome Fish's Chosen.
V) Honour thy single celled Amoeba that thine days shall be long in the Aquarium, for they were the first of the Lord thy Fish's Children.

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Post by Trailer Park Jesus » Sat Feb 16, 2008 1:47 pm

tom cruise is cool
magnus wants me. he's so gay.

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