The One Weakness of the Witch
Well, the dream job couldn’t last forever. The video game store closed down and I was unemployed. But, the good news was that I would never see Christine again… Or would I?
Written Warning
Written Warning – apoxuponme has struggled with the demon of sarcasm since childhood. Years ago, with his discovery of the Internet in a dark sacred cave on an Indian burial ground, a way to release these demons to the world was found. And so comes Written Warning, where we can see the true casualty of overextended internet use.
Sit On the Pews and Be Filled With God From the Bum Upwards
Two weeks ago I was walking down the street, searching for my gold crucifix that I had lost in a knife fight with a devil worshiping thug named Kip when I saw a puddle of water mixed with gasoline that formed itself into the image of Jesus’ kneecap.
Hangovers and Hate: an Easter Story
I walk in and there are all the typical annoying idiots everywhere! You couldn’t swing a dead cat around and not hit an annoying person. Allow me to recall this sea of humanity to you:
I Hate Monkeys
“Koko and Paul are challenging each other for supremacy of the clan… Koko is bigger, but Paul has a greater reach and is the odds on favorite for this match up of big time monkey fighting, right here!… on!… P.B.S.”
The Smiting of My Insert Key: A Photo Essay of Smiting
The terrible death throes of the plastic key were music to my psychotic ears, let me tell you for real.
The History of Mustard
This piece is a comedy/satire piece. Some may find it funny, some may find it offensive. But it’s no worse than your average episode of South Park or Family Guy.
M. Night Shyamalan, you suck!
Once you see them, you know exactly what is going on in the movie and it changes your attitude in a heartbeat; “Oh. Okay, I am now watching a comedy.”
apoxuponme’s Guide to Working in a Call Center
Never put your jacket on the back of your chair, as that is a fire hazard and could hinder someone from getting to an exit when they are fleeing from a fire, which could possibly have been caused by a jacket that was placed on the back of a chair.
Live Customer Service Reps
-Kristian: Is there any thing else I may assist you with?
-You say: Yeah… WTF is gehwolfoot care?!?!